The Last Saskatchewan Pirate

I used to be a farmer, and I made a living fine
I had a little stretch of land along the CP line
But times went by and though I tried, the money wasn't there
And the bankers came and took my land and told me, "Fair is fair"

I looked for every kind of job, the answer always "no"
"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "We just let 20 go"
The government, they promised me a measly little sum
But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum

Then I thought, "Who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone?"
I'm gonna be a pirate on the river Saskatchewan

'Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey, farmers bar yer doors
When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Arr! (Arr, arr)

Well, you'd think the local farmers would know that I'm at large
But just the other day, I found an unprotected barge
I snuck up right behind them, and they were none the wiser
I rammed their ship and sank it, and I stole their fertilizer

A bridge outside of Moose Jaw spans a mighty river
Farmers cross in so much fear, their stomachs are a-quiver
'Cause they know that Tractor Jack is hidin' in the bay
I'll jump the bridge and knock them cold, and sail off with their hay

'Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey, farmers bar yer doors
When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores
Arr! (Arr, arr)

Well, Mountie Bob, he chased me, he was always at my throat
He'd follow on the shoreline, but he didn't own a boat
But cutbacks were a-coming and the Mountie lost his job
So now he's sailing with me, and we call him Salty Bob

A swingin' sword, a skull and bones and pleasant company
I never pay my income tax, and screw the GST (screw it!)
Prince Albert down to Saskatoon, I'm the terror of the sea
If you wanna reach the co-op, boy, you gotta get by me

'Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey, farmers bar yer doors
When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

Arr, matey!
Get it, matey?
Hey, hey, that, that's really funny
You know, like we're real

Well, pirate life's appealing, but you just don't find it here
I've heard that in Alberta, there's a band of buccaneers
They roam the Athabaska from Smith to Fort McKay
And you're gonna lose your Stetson if you have to pass their way

Well, winter is a-comin' and a chill is in the breeze
My pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze
I'll be back in springtime, but now I have to go
I hear there's lots of plunderin' down in New Mexico

'Cause it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey, farmers bar yer doors
When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

It's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains
Stealin' wheat and barley and all the other grains
It's a ho-hey, hi-hey farmers bar yer doors
When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores

When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores