I'M Not Okay

Tonight the monsters in my head are screaming so damn loud
But I built walls so high so they never even make a sound

It's a mask, it's a lie
It's the only home I've ever known
'Cause being who I really am
Has only left me more alone

I am not okay and I need you to see it
I have so much to say and no one to hear it
The reason I keep quiet with so much at stake
I always feel like a burden, let it silence me
You'll never understand why it's so hard to say
I'm not okay

(I'm not okay, I'm not okay)

I wish I had a scar, had a bruise on the surface
Any kind of proof
That everything I feel is more than just some sad excuse
(I'm not okay, I'm not okay)
My life's invisible abuse, I'm either judged or have to hide
The only symptom you can see (symptom you can see)
Is I don't wanna be alive

I am not okay and I need you to see it
I have so much to say and no one to hear it
The reason I keep quiet with so much at stake
I always feel like a burden, let it silence me
You'll never understand why it's so hard to say

I'll never have the words, I can't explain this hell
But what if it kills me if I keep it to myself?
To myself

I am not okay and I need you to see it
I have so much to say and no one to hear it
I'm not okay, I'm not okay
I'm never safe, it's not a phase
If I finally break, would you still stay?

Tonight the monsters in my head are screaming so damn loud