Don'T Touch My Clogs

Years before I was born father told this to me
It was one christmas morning in 73
There was one lonely gift nestled under the tree
My grandfather said don't touch my
He said boy listen close I am saying this once
These were worn by my parents and their parent's parent's
Now they're yours but be sure to guard them with your life
He said don't ever let them
Touch
My
Clogs
You can take my cash
You could burn my house
You could force feed trash
I'd let you kick my balls
While I chewed on glass
Before I even thought about letting someone
Touch
My
Clogs
You'll have to take my life
Have to steal my dog
Have to beat my wife
You'll have to kill my mom
With a rusty knife
You'll have to BREAK MY LEGS
Before I ever let you
Touch
My
Clogs
Father said you're my son
So I'll tell you the truth
I wore clogs without socks
For the bulk of my youth
Now these clogs
They are yours
Protect them with your life
I pray you never let them
Touch
Your
Clogs
You can slap my wrists
I'd let you shave my head
Let you wax my pits
I'd even butt chug bleach
While you twist my nips
And after all of that
I still wouldn't let you
Touch
My
Clogs
You could eat my lunch
You can knock me out
With a one inch punch
And make me drink your sweat
From a dirty sponge
You'd have to shoot me dead
Before I ever let you touch my clogs
It's my purpose in life
To keep them safe until my child is at least 25
Then I will pass the clogs to them and they'll wear them with pride
And every single day from then they'll make sure no one has
Touched
Their
Clogs
They're the one thing I love
The only thing that makes me sure there's a god up above
Those wooden clogs on my feet yeah they fit like a glove
And I would give up everything before I ever let you
Touch
My
Clogs
Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the lord my clogs to keep
If I should die before I wake
I pray the lord my clogs to take
You can take my cash
You could burn my house
You could force feed trash
I'd let you kick my balls
While I chewed on glass
Before I even thought
About letting someone
Touch
My
Clogs
You'll have to take my life
Have to steal my dog
Have to beat my wife
You'll have to kill my mom
With a rusty knife
You'll have to break my legs
Before I ever let you
Touch
My